Guest Post

William J. Clough, author and former reporter with Nottingham newspaper Central Times files this report:

SESAME STREET GANG STRIKES AGAIN
The gang of crack thieves known to police as the Sesame Street Gang struck again late last night on Thursday Street in Nottingham. The thieves broke into three parked vehicles and stole all articles beginning with the letter 'H'. One of the victims, a man in his thirties who cannot be named for legal reasons, said this morning: "It's an absolute disgrace. When I went to my car I found they had stolen my hat, my headrest, a bag of Hula Hoops and some of my CDs, including 'Hatful Of Hollow' by The Smiths and 'Hunky Dory' by David Bowie. To add insult to injury, I had to call the RAC out to help me get into my car as all the handles had been stolen too."
The gang, which incorporates three members, has been known to police for sometime, but as yet no arrests have been made. The Chief Constable of Nottingham, Inspector 'Legs' Templeton, told our reporter: "We know two of the felons go by the name of Burt and Ernie. The third member of the gang should be easy to spot – he's an enormous flightless yellow bird with red and white striped legs."